Today SHE would be 4...

Today is a day unlike any other. Today is our beautiful baby, Lilia's birthday. Today she would be 4, I cannot believe that 4 years have gone by since the last time I held her and she was with us. It can't be... I feel like it was yesterday I was able to say, Hello, and then sadly say, Goodbye. I tell myself that after 4 years this should be easier, I shouldn't be as emotional or sad. But every year on this day I take the time to remember ever minute I did spend with her. I don't talk about Lilia very often but I think about her every day. I miss her every day. Just this last week I was teaching piano lessons and one of my students was playing, Families Can Be Together Forever, and I had to fight off the tears. For me, I know this to be true. We will one day be able to hold her and take care of her. She will be able to meet her brothers and sister and they will know her. I don't usually share many of the sentiments from that time but I want to share the words of my mother in law, Anne Davey. She spoke at Lilia's Funeral and this is what she said.

Lilia Sue Shafenberg

For 8 months I tried to convince Emily to name this baby after me & her Mother, Lisa. But, Emily was unwavering, and of course she could articulate exactly why the name Lilia was perfect! Emily’s favorite flower is the calla lily. Aaron’s favorite bible passage is Matthew 6:28 – “Consider the lilies of the field how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin”. Aaron & Emily’s marriage blessing was adorned with beautiful calla lilies. And of course, Aydan could easily pronounce the name “LILI”. So, just as her parents intended, Lilia was indeed, a perfect name for a perfect child!

L – I – L – I – A.

L – is for the LOVE this family had for Lilia long, long before she arrived. We knew her scheduled birth date. We knew her name. The nursery was perfectly decorated. This family could not wait to share their love with Lilia!

I – is for the INNOCENCE of a child. Completely unstained by the flaws of our world, Lilia is now bathed in the pure white of GOD’s love.

L – is for the LASTING memories this family will have of our beautiful Lilia. Her full head of hair, her long feet, her cleft chin and her perfect fingers and toes. Although we had only a few hours with her, those hours produced a lifetime of memories!

I – is for the INFINITE wisdom and mercy of GOD. However difficult to understand, we now place our trust in HIS plan.

A – is for this ANGEL sent to Aaron, Emily and Aydan Shafenberg. A gift on loan, now back home with GOD.

Lilia we love you and miss you and can't wait to see you again, but for now we know our Heavenly Father is holding you and taking care of you until we meet again.